More and goodbye for now. The last week or so I've taken it easy with my wife. Basically trying to live my life and let her live hers, of course there are the kids to take care of. Several times my wife noted that things were going well. In fact, I think if we didn't have the D hanging over us, it would have just been a normal weekend. But today I was reminded that we do have the Big D hanging over us. Something sparked a small fight with W. Then she told me that she still has a long way to go with regards feeling better about me and us. I know that is the case. She did acknowledge that she is a little crazy now. She did give me some indications that she is looking at working on things. After the fight we were playing with our son and my W says.."It's just going to take some time." That seem to be her theme during the fight too. I was thinking, but didn't say, if we get divorced it doesn't have to take time. This could mean nothing of course. She has to decide if she can get past some of the things about me and how long it will take.
She also said something very interesting with regard to the DB process. She knows nothing about it nor what my plan is. But she said..."It's like you are trying to win me back by being a good husband and father." It's like she saw right through the DB process or at least how it appears. I just said I was trying to do better to make me feel better (which is the truth), but I can't deny that trying to win her back is part of the DB process as I see it. It's just how you do it. The change has to be real. W's can spot faking it. Of course, I know my W is no dummy...she has a PhD in psychology for chrissake.
So I think I need to take a break from this site for now and not read stories and just focus on improving me. I will try to keep you abreast to see if mine will be a "success story" or not. I hope it is (for the obvious) but for other newcomers here.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
