Well my husband just packed up his stuff and even his mattress and moved to his business partners house.. i'm sure all the neighbours are gossiping as we speak. He said it was only for a few weeks. I can't stop crying.. although he said he wanted to separate a month ago, he's still been in the house.. after the last talk we had i,ve tried to calm myself down.. it's very hard when i'm this emotional.
This morning i told him i wanted to see his phone records or i'd cut the phone off.. he said i have no right, even though it's in my name, he said the separation isn't about another woman and that's not the reason he's leaving. I told him if he can't afford to pay his bills either he has to get out.. because it's not fair to me.. then it got ugly, again.. How is there any possible reconciliation when it gets to this point ? I feel so hopeless and alone and all i want is to desperately have my husband back and i feel like i am doing all the wrong things and now he's gone and moved out.. My heart is absolutely broken.. i can't even go shopping right now because everything reminds me our life together and no my future alone.. i know i'm not the only one feeling like this on these boards but i'm just so depressed. I've been trying to look my best every day, take care of myself, be more aloof and then it takes one outburst to ruin all the hard work.
I called my brother who is out of town for a chat because i haven't talked to him in awhile.. he told me he and his gf are expecting a baby and i'm going to be an aunt.. my mom and sister already knew and no-one wanted to tell me because they were trying to be sensitive and didn't want to give me good news that was probably going to be heartbreaking to me.. I was devastated and I was so angry at my husband for putting me in this position and spoiling what should have been a happy momentous occasion and i think that's why i woke up with every intention of having it out with him.
I really hope this gets easier.. because i can't handle this pain anymore
Me-41 H-34 T-9 M-8 10/21/10-BOMB 11/01/10-H moves out 01/27/12-H files
"Good memories tell you that your past was worth it, bad ones tell you that you were strong enough to go on"
