Called for night-nights at (8) last night and got no answer and no call back, so I sent a text at (9) to see how my girl did. Hour later (10) I got a text back asking if I was still up. I called and got to say goodnight to my girl. H said they had some really rough spots, but she was calmed down and getting ready for bed. Having melon and pretzels for dinner.
Keep going over my girl's meltdown last night. Once H figured out she wasn't physically hurt, just tired and upset, he lost patience with her fast.
She was drooling on my sweater and H brought over a paper towel to clean her up, but got frustrated when she wouldn't lift her face off my shoulder to let him wipe her off. Made acomment something like "just calm down, there's nothing wrong."
Getting her coat on to get her to his car, she was cooperating but still crying. H kept making frustrated snorts at her crying.
I was glad I got her first to help her calm down. H tends to go to time outs to get her to calm down. Doesn't work good, but he seems to think this is a discipline issue.
Seeing my H as a much more self absorbed person than I did before, especially when I look at my daughter. It is all about him now. He has the ability to be a very kind and giving man. Right now I see more and more of his selfish side. Don't like seeing it in how he deals with her though.
Before anyone smacks me upside the head, I know he isn't being abusive or trying to be mean. He loves that baby girl too. About a month ago he stuck his hand in a hot frying pan to keep her from pulling it onto her own head.
He just doesn't seem to get that she is hurting in a way he can't see. I hate sending her with him now. I hate how he discounts her feelings as unimportant.
Feel so angry at him, and disconnected from him.
Maybe I am feeling towards him now what he feels towards everyone arround him.
I hear him talk about his mom, his dad, his boss, most everyone. It is so distainful. They are all idiots and want too much from him. It is sad. Was he always this way? Did I just never see it?
