It'a All About Me

[Sanderika]

Hi Cas,

Glad you are doing well after your surgery. I believe you said this is your last one....Hooray to an end of that!!

I would say in the previous surgeries your H was acting out of obligation to you and the kids. He brought the kids to visit
because he felt he had to. Even though they are behaving like a cold dead fish, they still don't want people to think badly of them. I would recall that you also stated that he was rather removed about your situation and lacked genuine concern.

H emailing you personally is a real breakthrough. It shows genuine thought of you and was an effort of direct communication
so that you would know he was thinking about you and your surgery. I am concerned that you have not heard from him afterwords. I will be anxious to hear when and how he makes contact. For him to ask D does show you are on his mind.

I have come to realize that they want us to be well and they genuinely want the best for us. I do believe that they do still love us. I believe that they are surprised by these lingering feelings and truly can't seem to figure out how to right this huge wrong they have created.

Yesterday was Thanksgiving here. Even though I did not invite H to our dinner, I sent him a text: Happy Thanksgiving Day wishes to you! I never got a reply. I said I would DB to the bitter end. Son and I spent a very quite day at home with good food just the two of us. I will admit here that I am actually very hurt that I did not get a reply.

H and I had been sharing some very fun chats and interactions, including him doing several nice things for me and vice-versa for the past month. We involved our son and had some glimpses of family and I was wondering if he was peaking out of the dark. Yesterday proved his side really has not changed. I guess it's still a classical one sided friendship:(

I am actually mad at him, really mad at him.

My thought of the day.....They want friendship only and only on their terms.

Continue to recover well, (((Cas))). My thoughts are with you.

Sanderika