i am seriously glad i posted this as it seemed to have helped more than just me
i would like to try a little exercise if you all don't mind ...
let's write some statements we make that shows we are not detached, and then rearrange the statement that would show true loving detachment ... i will start ...
why in the world is he quiet, he must be thinking about the other woman, yeah that is it, he is thinking right now how awful it is to be at home and how he would rather be with her
wow, hubby must be really reflective today, he seems to be lost in his own thoughts. he needs space right now and he doesn't need to worry about how i am feeling so that he can have the time to process his own feelings
