It will make me sound like a nut case, but in truth, I guess I was. I always saw Christmas as a "romantic" time. Maybe I bought into all the movies, IDK. But being fogged out in the EA just had me dreaming of the wrong things--instead of my family and especially my H. But also, I had just gotten into the EA about the same time.....so I'm sure the timing had a lot of effect.
Could my H had done anything to stop or change it? In my case, I don't think he knew right then.....I honestly can't recall right now. If he did, he hadn't confronted me. The only thing that would have jerked me out of the dream state would have meant he ruined the holidays for everyone, and he wouldn't do that. He would suffer in silence, first.
In your case, she knows that you know. You have two little girls looking forward to Christmas, so you have much of the same burden as my H did. I would focus on them and put the W/OM/A on back burner till after Christmastime, for the sake of the children. I cannot think of anything you could accomplish for everyone's good by breaking up the family during this time. Others may disagree and tell you not to put up with her and to put her out of the house, and maybe at one time...I would have given that advice, but my gut feeling about this is to keep it together in the home front until afterwards.
You've done it before, GW, and I know you are tired and ready for it to be settled, but can you take your focus off of her and make this time for you and the girls? Live this next month....as if it would be the last month, and Christmas...as a family. Something to think about, isn't it? Make memories for your daughters. If your W will be a part of that, then good, and if she's too fogged out, stressed out, or whatever....stay focused on what is the most important thing...your children.
((hugs))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
