Immediate Help Needed on Confronting Spouce

[SDFoundGirl]

I'd get into MC now while your W is willing and the situation is fresh. It's easy to slip back into old patterns of behavior once the crisis is over. Besides, regardless of what you or your W have said about the M, there's still a lot more unspoken.

To quote from one of my favorite young adult novels, _Walk Two Moons_ by Sharon Creech, "The truth was hidden beneath piles and piles of unsaid things."

Ultimately, those unsaid things and undealt with issues is how most of us get into this place in our marriages. A good MC will help you say the hard things, listen to each other, and communicate better. Do your research and look for someone who is solution-based and has experience with couples counseling. Ask friends, look on Yelp, do Google searches on prospective therapists. And if the MC isn't a good fit for you as a couple, then don't hesitate to find another one.

DBing helped me stop a potential divorce and EA, but MC is what helped me build a great marriage. There's no substitute for in-person help to deal with all of those unsaid and hurtful things.

H and I stayed in MC for almost two years. While we were estranged and up until about 6 months after we reconciled, we went weekly. Our MC then weaned us to biweekly, then monthly, then bimonthly until we decided we were ready to handle it on our own. It's laid the foundation for the way we deal with things in our M now.

SD