Glad to join your fanclub;). Sounds like we are all smitten with your cookie escapades!!!
I don't really have my own thread, but started out at Sandi's place, and FMV has been so kind as to let me post on her thread "Arguing".
I essentially came here in a panic when my long-time online chess opponent & good friend suddenly became much more about a month ago. It was a wake-up call for me that I was VERY vulnerable due to decades in a good, but REALLY SSM. Let's see... H and I haven't been intimate in over 5 years this last dry spell. In the past, I had been tempted by my old college sweetheart (who is always at the ready if I say the word) but nipped that in the bud.
I'm extremely involved with my kid's lives, but this emptiness in my marriage has manifested itself inany negative ways through the years... Most recently a profound depression I could not pull myself out of. The OM in my EA had been kind, supportive, and given me love words I haven't heard in over 20 years. I know it can't go anywhere... We both discovered he is MUCH younger and lives 1000 miles away. It's a fantasy, an addiction, and I realize all that.
However, I do miss the love -- I can't lie. I've given H multiple hints and opportunities in the past few weeks -- asking him to get/read certain books, go out with me to an adultvfunction without the kids, etc. He just doesn't get it. He talks to me like a technical manual, and after all these years I want LOVE, and yes sex, intimacy, the whole enchilada. I've stayed around because ILH, and know he loves me, but most of all the kids. Now that the youngest is getting ready to go to college ??
Will not WAW for EA, but if there is no change, I might have to do so just to have some love in my life while I'm still young enough to do so...
The EA showed me how much I've given up to stay in M... And frankly. Not sure a SSM is worth staying in if H isn't interested in trying. Not sure if he had OW on the side, Porno, gay, or WHAT... Not in his character, but I feel really rejected and until EA just gave up even caring about myself it was so futile.
Sorry Romeo to hijack YOUR thread, but so glad to see someone here coming out happy and whole. You've got the healthiest attitude toward your ex that I've ever seen! Wish my H appreciated the best years of my life that I gave, and that I risked my life giving him those beautiful kids:(
