It's not over till it's over right?

[DoneAfter10]

I'm wondering the same thing. Our situations appear to be very similar. Been married for 10 years. had baby in April. PA with OW started in July. He left in October for good and filed for D. I'm not sure if he is still in contact with OW b/c I haven't asked in two weeks now (trying DB). He supposedly had no contact with her at that time, but why stop now since he's filed? KWIM? It's so very difficult and is so crazy and senseless b/c it seems like they have to become someone else in order to have an affair and carry on with something that is so wrong.
One thing I have been researching is Joe Beam's Love Path--google it. He talks of the term "limerence" which is very much like deep infatuation, but more like an addiction. Google "limerence Joe Beam" and you will find quite a bit of info on it. It helps put things into perspective a bit. Not saying it makes things easier, but it helps them make a bit more sense.