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Shelby Offline OP
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Seeking,

I was diagnosed September 2007. Walking in the 3-Day breast cancer walk for the first time this past October 2010 was one way I tried to reclaim my strength.

yes, I am feeling more confident, trying to run the drop off in my head. I think if I walk in there like it is any other occasion I will be fine, then quickly say my hello's and get the heck out of there.

Thank you for your support, Shelby


Me:43
H:43
T:20 YRS
M:15 YRS
Bomb: 6/9/08
Bomb#2 7/6/10
Served with papers at work 7/13/10
DD:14, DD:11
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Oh Sweetie,

You already have all the strength inside that you will ever need to face anything in your path. You have faced and fought one of the greatest fears a woman has.

Yes! Keep running the scenario over in your head till you feel confident and then stick to the game plan with a beautiful smile on your face. Keep thinking of that old saying, "Never let them see you sweat!"

I've no doubt you can pull this off!

You're welcome! We're here to help see each other through.

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Shelby Offline OP
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Oh boy...new dilemma.

This morning I get a message from STBXH that says....Please, come for Thanksgiving it will be okay.

So now what, should I stay when I bring my Daughters there or should I stick to the original plan ?


Me:43
H:43
T:20 YRS
M:15 YRS
Bomb: 6/9/08
Bomb#2 7/6/10
Served with papers at work 7/13/10
DD:14, DD:11
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,262
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Hi Shelby!

I found you!
I wondered what happened to you...glad to see you are still around!

Do you think his family forced him to ask you?
What do you want to do?
Sounds like a good opportunity to visit with his family.
Do you think you can handle being in the same house with him without getting emotional?


M48 H53
M16 T18
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SS30
H drops bomb PA/8-30-09
H leaves 12-30-09
D filed by H 2-10
H asks to come home 4-11
Piecing
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Shelby,

Do what you think you can handle.

If it's not something you want to do a polite no thanks, I already have plans and then doing what you were going to do initially will get him wondering.

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Why not try it. YOU can do ANYTHING.


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Shelby,

I might suggest going too. Even if it is just for a little while.

You can always make an excuse to leave, like plans, if it gets too uncomfortable.

No expectations, no uncomfortable conversations, just enjoy the day. That is what holidays are for.



"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
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Shelby Offline OP
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Hi Courageous Wife,

I am still around,took a little break, but I am back now.
I have been doing good, The holidays coming set me back a little, but I will make it through it one way or another and be fine...still deciding what to do about Thanksgiving and then I will worry about Christmas later.

Hope you are doing good, anything New?


Me:43
H:43
T:20 YRS
M:15 YRS
Bomb: 6/9/08
Bomb#2 7/6/10
Served with papers at work 7/13/10
DD:14, DD:11
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 2,588
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Shelby,
Stopped by to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving!

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Shelby Offline OP
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Thanks Seeking answers !! Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving Day too !!

I went to my in laws. With a play it by ear attitude. I wans't sure if I was just going to go in and say hi to everyone then leave, Or stay for dinner too. It seemed to be going good, and mother in law asked me to stay again, So when I had a moment alone with STBXH, I asked if he was okay and if he was feeling awkard. He said it was fine if I stayed.....So I did.

There might have been some awkward moments, at least in my head, Like where do I sit ? but once I figured that out it was fine.

Glad I went. I quess he will let me know if he had a real problem with it.


Me:43
H:43
T:20 YRS
M:15 YRS
Bomb: 6/9/08
Bomb#2 7/6/10
Served with papers at work 7/13/10
DD:14, DD:11
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