I didn't sleep well last night, frustrated that we may not have the money to enter the dance competition in January. My tendency is to be overly accommodating instead of identifying and advocating for my needs. I've been letting her decide what to attend and focus on in lessons. I now would like to try a dance competition.
When we were first married we split expenses, which allowed me to save a great deal of money. I took over the expenses several years ago when my W was unemployed for about a year, during a period of depression. This hasn't changed. Since that time I haven't been able to save like I used to. She is generous with her money, and I do have access to the joint account for minor expenses.
I'm finding myself wanting to throw up my hands and tell her to just forget it, maybe to avoid getting my hopes up and later be disappointed. I'm not sure what the best compromise is--coming up with a financial solution to do this event, or waiting until we've had consistent cash flow and trying another event next year.
I sent her an email letting her know that I would like to do 2-3 local dance competitions per year. That's my position for now. I'll need to be flexible about the one in January. I don't want her to do it if it's going to cause financial stress, or her heart's not into it. The dance teacher is skeptical about our commitment to this. We'll need to make a decision soon.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
