Broken: "She probably feels that this OM is the love of her life and he "really" gets her. "
I cannot presume to know what she's feeling. My sense is her WAW syndrome is mainly about not wanting to be married anymore. The EA is morally conflicting her and causing feelings of guilt and complicating her head. She goes out alot with her girlfriends, some of whom are single and/or divorced. This OM, her EXH from her teenage past is just the catalyst that pushed her over the edge, endorphans or whatever.
I fear for her safety as well. The EXH sought her out over the internet. These types are usually after only one thing. If she gets cold feet about a PA and only wants to meet for old times sake, it could get ugly or even dangerous. Of course she was married to him; I don't even know him, but you know how a million things go though your mind.
Broken: "The key here, I think, is that you have to figure out a way to make her fall in love with you again"
Most of the advice I've gotten is to make the changes for me and not for her. If she finds me attractive again, fine; if not, I have to be fine with that too. My coach has pointed out the problems in our R and we've been basically too independent and taking one another for granted. What we should have had was a "partnership" and an emotional connection, which somewhere along the way got lost. Of course since the bomb, ironically I feel more emotionally connected to her than ever, while she's the exact opposite. So I've got that mountain in front of me.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
