We got very much into my behavior and how my reactions cause this or that problem. She was raped in her youth, and has been in therpy for that. She is definitely too free with other men right now, and we feel that the rape is a factor.
She talked about how she can just talk to OM, and he never judges her. She feels confined talking to me. I might note that OM has nothing to lose here. I know, I need to try to be as if I have nothing to lose, too...but I have lots to lose, including some of my time with my children.
We totally ignored the poor choice of bringing the OM into the equation in the first place.
As a joke, the pastor did a quick set of wedding vows when we were getting ready to leave. I said, "I do, but I don't think I want to hear her answer". Sure enough she said "If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have." How cruel is that? How much does that invalidate 15 years of my life? This is a woman who said she loved me 2 weeks ago!
That's when I stormed out. Childish, but I was a fraction of a second from saying "F- you" to my wife and a pastor. The storming out was the lesser of two evils.
