Albuquerque living part 2: Road to recovery?

[Albuquerque]

Journaling,

Not much new to report other than H is still really confused. He went out of town for a few days last week. We were in contact a lot via IM, texting, calls etc. He was pretty flirty and in the evenings, he was all bemoaning the distance between us because the sexual tension was getting kind of high. Needless to say, I was looking forward to his return on Friday. He arrived back in town at the same time as dinner was ready and I invited him over if he hadn't eaten. He came over and enjoyed a nice dinner with me and D. But despite a short little make out session at the end of the evening, he seemed insistent on leaving and going back to his place rather than spending a few extra hours at the house. I was very tired anyhow and didn't mind too much. He asked me to update him on what the plan was on Saturday.

So on Saturday morning, I told him my plans with D and that he was welcome to join. He didn't call until around 3pm, long after D and I had already had our fun. I had a short chat with him where I'm pretty sure he unintentionally mistook me for OW. We were talking about movies that we might want to watch and he was looking online to see what Netflix movies were available to stream. He mentioned one to me as if I should know it. I said I didn't know what it was. He asked, "I thought you watched it and said you hated it?". I told him no. Then he kind of backtracked and said "I thought you did, maybe that was someone else I was talking to".

It didn't really bother me. It's bound to happen. But I think it bothered him. Because even though he had originally planned to take D and I out to dinner, he contacted me about an hour later and said that he didn't know if he'd be up for dinner because he started having some anxiety issues and wasn't feeling great. I told him that was fine and that I hoped he felt better. An hour after that, he said he was feeling better and we DID end up going out to dinner. Dinner was good and H was kind of affectionate towards me even in view of D which was a bit surprising. It was subtle though so I don't know if she noticed. But once again, in the evening, he seemed to really just need to go back home.

On Sunday, he had stated he would come over to watch a sporting event with us on TV. By mid-afternoon, 30 minutes AFTER it started, I finally texted him to see if he was still coming because it would affect my pizza order. He asked when the event started and I told him 30 minutes ago. He seemed surprised and ended up coming over, but I could tell he had been sleeping. And it was 2 in the afternoon. And yet again, once the event was over, he seemed to rush off. He made a not so subtle remark that he should come over for a "nooner" tomorrow but I reminded him that D was out of school all week for the holidays. Shortly after leaving, he texted me and said "Sorry for leaving so abruptly " I told him "no worries"

Haven't heard from him since then. I have opted to give him space these last few days. Clearly he's still troubled. He may still be getting contact from OW (or perhaps initiating). I'm not sure how well the "ending it" has been working. The hardest thing about reconciling is figuring out when to treat H like the MLCer he is and when to be a bit proactive about the R. I've given him some space over the weekend but I think today I will at least ask if he wants to talk and mention that I could see he had a rough weekend.