Thanks, but I still am feeling a tad angry and confused with the DB process. It seems that the person who doesn't want the divorce has to do all the changing and all the hard work while the person who wants to leave gets a free pass to do anything and everything they want...including the bad things that led to the breakdown.
I find myself very angry with W because I feel I'm doing all the work on the relationship and she can do what she wants. I know it's because you can't make the other person change and they have to do it for themselves. But what if they never change or care or want to change?
it can be exhausting and frustrating. I know I'm luckier than many here.
Also, my wife and I had a quick chat this morning. She asked how I was doing. I said better. Then she asked why, I said I'm feeling more positive about us. Then she said "Good, I am too." She added that when I was sad and depressed about the situation (I would breakdown in front of her) she felt helpless and that a decision had been made already. So she couldn't feel positive. Interesting lesson. Of course after all that "positive" talk she added at the end, "I don't know how this will turn out." I guess the glass is half empty person said that divorce is still an option, while the optimist could say "at least she hasn't made up her mind."
It's a process.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
