Immediate Help Needed on Confronting Spouce

[Mike.4545]

Well GusP, if all her reactions at this point are genuine, then I think you guys have a really good chance.

BUT

I would be very VERY cautiously optimistic. You never know, she could be pretending to throw herself back into working on the marriage to get you off her tracks...so just be careful.

I would work on improving every controlling tendency (and other issues) you had that caused stress in the relationship, EXCEPT when asking for transparency from her. You need access to her lines of communication to make sure a relationship with the OM doesn't spark back up...if it did indeed end.

Tell her that trust needs to be re-established, and that if she wants to improve the marriage, she can help rebuild that trust by being transparent. Also make sure you offer to do the same (give her access to any of your accounts) Tell her that there should be nothing to hide between spouses and you're willing to be completely open and transparent too.

Good luck man! I hope you get this all back on track quickly!