My goals are to focus on my kids and my job and my blessings...friends, family and God.
--My kids are great and they need me. --I am so lucky that I work for myself and love my job. I need to keep the practice growing --I have wonderful friends, old and new, and I love spending time with them. I tried a new relationship with a very nice man, but didn't want to spend all of the very little free time I have with just him. I want community right now. A big circle, not a little one. --My family took a back seat during my M, and I'm enjoying spending more relaxed time with them. My XH didn't like them and they have said they did not feel welcome in my home. I want an "open door" where everyone is welcome --I want to continue the spiritual journey I'm on and replace "wanting" and "desire" (all future things) with "enjoyment" (a present thing). This is hard for me because I'm a forward looking person. Hard to just be quiet and sit still in the moment! --I want to get past thinking about XH and OW. To not have them take one molecule of precious space in me. This might be the hardest thing. Even if divorce is eventually a relief and if you feel happier and freer, the processing of all the junk is hard to get through. Externally I've let it go, but internally it still takes up space. I think many of us might still have some hope that the X will "wake up" and become the person you thought you married, instead of their current undesirable self. Its the illusion of who you thought they were that is hard to let go of. Would I even LIKE my X now if I met him today. I don't think so. Hard to reconcile that with the man I married.
