Sandi, just read one of your posts to lostandconfused. I am dropping the rope (well at least faking it to begin with). You are right -- let him go, let him see what he is missing. However, right now we have so much financial/visitation crap to deal with. He wants this over, he wants me to file -- what should I do. I have told him to file if that's what he wants, but he refuses because he says I will tell the children "See, mom tried, but dad won't try. Our family is broken up because of dad." My parents want me to use their pitbull lawyer and nail him to the ground. H wants to go to a mediator instead of a lawyer, and he wants me to initiate it. So..... any answers? If I'm not supposed to care, should I just go to the lawyer and file?
He's trying to get you to divorce him? No way. That would be enabling him for his poor choices AND he's trying to control you.
He wants out, he does the heavy lifting.
You can't stop him from divorcing you, seeing the OW, or being an a$$hat, but you can stop him from disrespecting you. YOU can detach from him, but you have got to stop arguing and go focus on you.
If he wants out bad enough, he will chew off his arm to get out. Not try and make you do the dirty work for him.
