Oh Ivy, please don't go down that path. I did, and I will regret it till the day I die!
Here's the reason, Ivy:
Quote:
the apathy in my marriage.
It is very easy to have a crush on another man when things become dull in your MR. Every thead that I've read on this board admits to their M becoming routine, boring, taking each other for granted, no romance, on & on. Yes, some have more serious problems,but the majority are just like yours.
A woman can get struck on OM and then she starts seeing all these things wrong with her H. Suddenly, she isn't attracted to him like she once was. She starts feeling very cold toward him. She may not admit it at first,but she even starts to lose some of her respect for him. He may be a good person and she had no intentions of hurting him.....but he just doesn't make her happy anymore. In fact, now that she thinks about it....she hasn't been happy in a long time.
But, this OM at work makes her feel.....alive. She hasn't felt like this in a long time. It must be love. Surely she wouldn't feel so strong about him if it wasn't real.
Ivy, I've been down that road before. I know exactly what you're thinking & feeling. I can tell you why you came to a Divorce Busting chat board. You are reaching out. I did that, too. However, I was trying to justify leaving my H and chosing OM over him. I'm not sure if I knew that right then or not,but that's really what I was doing. I heard stuff I didn't want to hear. But, I found some wonderful people right here on DB board,and it saved my M.
I can tell you the cure for what you are going through. Let me know when you're ready.
((hugs))
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
