So my W came on saturday to get her belongings. She is moving in with OM.
Fortunately, U-H@ul gave her a larger truck than she planned on as we filled that right up. She now has everything that is either hers from before; a gift; or I have no need for.
It was a quick 40 minute load. She had a friend from work drive and help. I was upbeat and "me". I could go on but that is pretty much all there is to say.
She thanked me twice at the end and in a very sincere way. far beyond a normal, casual "thanks." I am reading nothing into it. My responses were "Anytime" and "You're welcome".
On cue, today she began a text exchange regarding the house. It is posted below for both clarity and an insight into where I am right now. I hope you enjoy it.
W: Thanks again for the help on sat! I was talking to a customer of mine, he can do an appraisal on the house anytime. I said I would talk to you. That way we know what its worth and hopefully get it on the market. I'm sure you don't want to take the house on yourself or can't but I can't pay for it for too much longer. I'm thinking if we take a hit we take a hit. W: What's your thoughts? ( I gave it over two hours before responding) W: Do you want me to call you tonight? We can talk about it?
CD: You are welcome for the help. I understand your feelings regarding the house and the obligation it represents. Though an appraisal is an obvious stage in this process, neither completing one nor listing the house is of any use if we do not have a Separation Agreement that lays out our financial standing. Without knowing that, neither you or I would even be in a position to evaluate whether we could or should accept any offer. With that in mind, the priority is that we each save for the 2-3K we will each need to pay (mediator) for his services to mediate the agreement and make the appointment when we have the funds. Neither of us are well off financially because of this situation so it could take a little time. But we will have to continue to do the best we can with what we have until we can completely resolve this.
W: I hope it gets done soon, I don't have 3k for anything. So my options are? If I declare bankruptcy I guess the bank sells the house? I have no idea what to do, and can't afford to do this. I'm financially drained.
CD: I'm sorry to hear that. I truly am. However, this was not my choice and I have done and will continue to do everything I can to protect our daughter and me. If I now need to protect her and I from your bankruptcy, then I thank you for the advance notice.
W: No I'm just saying I don't know what to do. I guess we just pay till its done. (D2) has nothing to worry about. She has everything she needs. I just am saying its time to list the house. Regardless if we lose or not. I can't afford to pay forever with you living there. I need the house to go and everything will be fine. Can you afford it by yourself? I know I couldn't. Maybe we rent it? That's an option? W: Rent it till we can sell it??
CD: There are far too many questions in your last text. I am going to need to think about this some more. I can tell you that it will be virtually impossible to rent out a house with a for sale sign on the lawn. So we can eliminate that one. I will get back to you in email as this is not a matter for BB Msngr. And I cannot afford to do this during my work hours. Thank you for your thoughts, feelings and ideas.
W: Ok. Well just a thought... Thank you for your replies, I can call you later.
CD: You're welcome. Until I've had some time to think about this more, a call is unneccesary. Thank you for the offer.
W: Ok. Well I'm sorry things didn't work out and I'm really trying to make this the least difficult I can, for (D2) too.
CD: Me, too. It will all work out for the best, I'm sure.
It's now been almost two hours since I sent the last reply and have seen nothing back.
I may post again tonight as I believe I have really taken some leaps over the last 48 hours.
