You sound better John. Just be careful in explaining your actions to her. She will think you are doing them for the wrong reasons. "Hey look I'm not going to the tournament... so I can see our son...." Let your ACTIONS do the talking for you. It will carry more weight. If you tell her then she will think you're are only doing it to get her attention.
At dinner. Validate. But let her chase you. Hold your ground in order to gain back the respect that has been lost.
