We took up so much space we got locked out of your thread, so I am starting a new one for you. I did not think that my little fingers could contribute to so much cyberspace clutter.....LOL.
Cloudy,
I am relieved to see that you were much more at ease last night when you posted. Whew!! I know that this is a very tough time for you, but you can make the changes that you need to see yourself through this.
No matter what happens, you have to make sure that the kids are taken care of first and that they know how much you love them. Too often the kids are caught in the middle of these messes and left in the dirt. I do not get the feeling that you are that kind of man. My impression is that you are a caring father, involved in his children's lives, so keep that up.
I hope that the changes that you are making for yourself are giving you a better frame of mind. Don't hesitate to use these forums as a sounding board, because sometimes in the depth of our repective sitch's, we all need a saner point of view. I have been helped though my days of hell and I cannot thank all of those that reached out to me. Keep posting and you will find skills out here that can help you.
You want to know about little ol' me? Essentially, nothing has changed in my life. Was at my house for the past week due to family and holiday obligations, but little progress from the H. Granted, his responses to my questions were more thought out than previously, so that was something. Still no physical contact..... Moved back to the friend's because I am sticking to my guns after drawing my line in the sand. H was not happy about me moving back to the friends' but the ball is in his court...
I don't think so much as he is making baby steps, but making baby stumbles...falling on his butt right now, but there is a bit of effort from him. I'm seeing how this is going, too many years to ditch the whole thing, but I am making him do most of the work right now. If he wants me, well, he is going to have to make big changes and not just for right now, either. They better be permanent, or he knows that I am walking and not looking back.
He claims that he is trying to make an appointment with the counseling specialist that he was referred to. I would not do this, too. He has to take responsibility for what has happenned between us.
I have not been on the anti-depressants for about two weeks which is good for me. Having a bunch of fun on the Just for Fun links, not behaving myself at all. Like I ever could.
