I'm so sorry for your loss of your family member. You have quite a lot on your plate. I'm sorry too for your wife's behavior right now.
It isn't hopeless....these situations are turned around all the time. As hard as it may be to imagine that.....let yourself do it. If she were really mentally ill, got amnesia, and pretended to be someone else for awhile, and then were hit over the head and snapped back to the person you've always loved....you'd probably forgive her and move on, right? Often a MLC affects people like that. This may not be what she's going through, but it may be.
If it were, what you would need is a LOT of patience, and a 'bit' of detachment. And a heart that would let you pick up signs of a change back. It can go quickly, and it can take a while...sometimes 6m-2yrs.
That's a lot of wear and tear on your heart.....but if you knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel, you could do it, right?
Give yourself a break right now....you have a lot on you. Don't let her behaviors etch too much into your heart right now. She's just not well.
Thank you so much for the post,
If I saw any light at the end of the tunnel, yes I could do it, I would do anything for my wife and family.
What she is doing is things a person who is really done with a marriage does.
I just wish she would see what this is doing to our boys, and me.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
