Happy New Year! Although I am not sure if you want to acknowledge the new year right now...
Wow - do you dig and find out more or just wait until he gets back? Tough position to be in.
Let me play devil's advocate - Suppose your H comes back after his soul-searching and wants to focus on your R and tells you everything. Do you have any concerns that if he finds out you have been digging it will blow any chance of a future? Or are you past that at this point?
If he comes back and doesn't disclose any of what you know, will you ask him about the house purchase to see if that opens other doors? Will you ask him what the OW is holding over his head that has him so scared? Is there a way to ask him about the house without his knowing that you were digging? (An errant phone call from the city assessor's office perhaps?)
I too would be like a mother lion protecting my young. I am confident that you can take care of yourself and your D. I am also confident that you will be able to get what is rightfully yours and hers should it come to that.
So in the meantime, can you let it go a bit? Just ride it out and focus on your D. Unfortunately all the together time you guys have spent as a family has probably made her miss your H even more.
I find that ironic in my sitch too. My H spends more time here than anywhere, but can't take that step to come back for some reason. My kids have gotten closer to him as a result of spending more time alone with him, but now they want him here all the time.
Well, I figure you can't win for trying - and can only control yourself - so I just continue the ride...
Hang in there. I'm praying for you. In fact, I woke up during the night thinking about the fact that if you dig and he finds out, it might wreck any chance of a future. So tread carefully please...
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
