Pie, you do need to do some more detaching. (Yes, the pot is calling the kettle black!) I would just pretend you never sent the email. If your H brings it up, then fine, but if not, let it go.
The MLC question is tough, but kind of academic. Your tasks are the same. Detach and take care of yourself.
I think the best advice I have gotten on this board was from 25yearsmlc. She said to start thinking of ways that your life would be BETTER if your H never came back. No matter how much you love someone, there is always SOMETHING. With a MLC spouse the list starts to pile up fast once you allow yourself to think about it.
