Pie's Story - he's comfortable again

[angel61]

Albuquerque,
Your post inspires me. I always think that he is not noticing. Its hard to tell on a day by day basis. However, loking back at the big picture, I do realize that since I have started DB techniques our situation has somewhat improved.And I have only changed a little, the 180 is easy to say but hard to do! Old habits die hard.
One thing thugh that I have done which seems counter to the DB techniques is that I have become more loving and affectionate. I did it before I read DB, but it was like a 180. In the past, because my main complaint about my H was his lack of affection, I responded by cutting off my affection to him too. Like if you can't give it to me I won't give it to you. But I suddenly realized that he felt unloved by what I did, and so I started being loving and affectionate. At first he was shocked and felt overwhelmed, but when started DB'ing and took it away, it seemed to take away our connection. So ow I have gradually put it back, but to a much lesser degree, and in a way that doesn't demand something back. he seems to be responding positively to it. The good thing is it alsomakes me feel better and more functional at work.
Some people think it is cake eating, but hey, if it seems to work I will give it a try!