Pie's Story - he's comfortable again

[ericmsant2]

Pie,

Personally, I think the email exchange was okay….here are my thoughts…

Your responses to HIM….

i replied that he is not a despicaple human being

You showed him that you still care for him – so that should answer his questions of if you still love him.

I didnt know he was that unhappy

This could be interpreted two ways…1) you are accepting some responsibility or 2) you are giving him an excuse for YOUR behavior. I would like to think #1 was your intent.

i would have done anything in my power to make him not feel that way

Why do WE always think that WE can control how SOMEONE else feels. I understand why you said this Pie, but really would have done “anything”…think about that for a second. Anything for HIM right now would be to give him whatever HE wants regardless of what YOU want and need. Does that sound like a healthy R?

So what do I do everyone?

Far be it for me to tell YOU want to do in YOUR life. Having said this, what do YOU really want at this point in YOUR life? What do you need? Do me a favor, write down what your ideal R is. What characteristics in your partner you need, what hobbies would you like to share with that person. While doing this, do not think of your H…just think about what YOU really need. This may help you answer YOUR question.

I asked him if he still had feelings for me, and if he had sex with any of the dates

Why ask him? Would his words mean more than HIS actions? As for the sex…would you really want to know. I mean really. What do you hope to accomplish by knowing? Would it make reconciliation easier or harder? Can you change what already happened? OR do you need the answer to justify actions that YOU would take? IMO, I would not ask the question. It really does not matter. What matters is what YOU want YOUR future to look like!


God Bless,
Eric