Beyond Depression..but still a losing battle?

[awest1217]

I would just say don't fake it and don't be passive aggressive either. If you don't like it then I would talk to H about it directly. Not dealing with the R, but that you don't feel it is the best thing to do. Even bring up how you need some help paying for stuff with S. Maybe give him a list of things to buy each month (not a lot, but maybe a pack of diapers a month or some of S's favorite foods, etc). IT definitely would not add up to what you would get in child support, but if you come at it right, H may be willing to help some.

Then again, it may all backfire and H may say that it is your fault you are separated and you have to deal with it unless you file, which would definitely set you back a bunch.

You know what is best, but don't feel like you always have to support H. If you completely disagree with something because it is harmful to H, then tell him. Make sure it isn't said out of telling him what to do, but out of concern for him.

I agree you should be upset because tatooes are expensive and he isn't helping you at all. Also when you tell him you have other plans he goes off, but you always have to be ok with him not choosing to be with you when you offer. You have a right to be upset, but it is how you comminicate those feelings that is important. H can't think that you are ok with everything if you are not because that is not a good way to start a new R, but at the same time you have to let him be him.

Continue to do what you feel is best because it keeps working, but I do feel talking to him straight is important. Saying "I feel angry right now because..." instead of being passive aggressive and short with him because then you are modelling good communication for the both of you.

Hope it all turns out ok.