Update....Although, not much change to report at this point.
Have been focusing on kids most of this week with homecoming (huge deal here) and D19 coming home from college for the weekend. Also, S14 has been having some depression issues so I'm watching that carefully.
H met me at the football game on Friday night. Saturday after I got the kids off to the homecoming dance he and I had dinner. It was nice. Sunday we went to the movies and played putt putt. Tonight the boys and I met him for dinner. It was the first time S16 had seen him since he left. It went well - nothing heavy - just friendly.
Overall I am seeing MUCH more of my husband back - the H I know and love. You can just tell in the eyes when they're truly there. We still have work to do, obviously, before he comes back home but I am feeling very hopeful that we can get past this.
So far we have been focusing more on reconnecting than working through the harder issues. I know we cannot ignore those, but I felt that in order to have the desire to get through those, you have to be motivated to do so. Now that I feel that bond is back, it is time to start dealing with more serious matters. (This doesn't mean, btw, that I haven't been confirming NC or asking for transparency, etc...)
H and I need to put a picture together of what our married life should (and will!) look like. We have to put together a plan to meet each other's needs and make our relationship a priority. I have to feel secure that he is doing everything he can to guard himself from infidelity both now and in the future. I'm sure he wants to make sure the changes I've made are going to stick.
So far I think things are going well. I still haven't let my guard down and am protecting myself. I guess I don't feel quite secure enough to just let H back in totally yet. I think that's healthy though because he has to EARN that.
