Soleil: Read an email from him to her telling her that his roommate was out of town and did she want to get together. I feel physically ill every time I think about it. I wish I didn't know.
In other news:
Got an email from the landlord at our condo saying that the rent hadn't been paid yet. H is supposed to be paying it. I forwarded the e-mail to him. I suppose I broke NC doing that... this makes me worried that he's not paying his/our rent. I am stepping back though. I can't do anything about it. It's not impacting my credit rating as I'm not in that country, nor a citizen of that country where he is. I really could care less if my credit isn't up to snuff in a foreign land :-)
As for ME...I've been looking at apartments. Got that sick scared feeling yet again when I started calling places. I've never rented an apartment by myself. I'm so terrified. Oh well, about to go off to bed...read some R books, cuddle with the dogs, and fall into the murkiness of sleep (been sleeping 10 to 11 hours a day lately). I'm pretty sure I'm experiencing depression...never have before, but I'm certain I am now. I was considering antidepressants, but I've read they aren't effective for 'situational' depression. Much better to walk the dogs, work my butt off at the gym, journal here, try to get out with friends. I feel right now like I've got a bit of a social anxiety...I've never been this way before, but it's almost like I'm afraid to put myself out in drinking situations, where I used to love going to the bar, partying with friends. I'm just not into it, the few times I have done it since this sitch began I've woken up the next day feeling even more despondent. I don't have friends who really do anything else socially though. With winter coming up, I won't have my sports to fall back on. Any suggestions for new activities? I love the gym, yoga, I'm trying to get into some volunteering. I need to expand my circle of friends and quit kvetching about my sitch.
