Time2GiveUp,

I don't know much about your situation other than what I've read on here, but I think Sandi gave you some pretty good advice when she said to spell-out all the stuff you're going through for your husband, so that he understands your needs, and that you can't deal with them not being met anymore. Just tell him straight-up.."If we don't address our issues together then I won't be able to stay in this marriage any longer." Sounds like he needs a wake-up call.

- Sounds like you're going through a lot of turmoil, but do you think breaking up and leaving your family is going to make things better for you? I personally don't believe true happiness can or should be achieved by hurting people...especially the people that you love.

- Has your husband ever been to the doctor to get his hormone levels checked? Low testosterone can be triggered at almost any point in life, would likely get much worse as a man gets older, and could explain his very low sex drive. There are medications to help with this though...Just a thought.

IMHO, it seems like you're headed for disaster unless you toughen up, cut this OM out of your life, and get extremely open and direct with your husband that things need to change if he wants to keep you in his life.

Ok...enough from me, continue listening to Sandi as she will have much better advice than I could give!


M: 29, W: 28
Together 8 years, Married 1 (5/16/09)
Bomb (LYBNILWY)4/22/10
Affair discovered 5/3/10, began Jan/Feb 2010
Separated 5/22/10 - Present
Affair exposed 7/7/10
No children