Beatrice, You are quite right! Dear old Rip is still sleeping in the tunnel after all of these years. He's still doing the "one more time" activities of his youth and I hope he doesn't kill himself trying to be the young lad one more time. Still a dreamer and has never woken up. Still doesn't quite get it that divorce means separation in all areas of life, etc. Still running from the reflection of the man he once was in the mirror and continues to self-medicate along the way.
Lance, You are also quite right as well. He did a lot of damage that could not be repaired and I did make up my mind after the second runaway that I had had enough. That decision saved my sanity because I had to remain focused in all areas of my life that were under attack by him. I never held out any hope that he would ever return because of the type of personality he had prior to entering the tunnel. The length of his crisis had absolutely nothing to do with my decision early on to move on and protect the assets and my sanity. Survival was the game I had to win by my own wits for this man was one irrational person during the first 2 years of the deep crisis.
I can honestly say that I have had no regrets for my decision and am quite happy with the way my life has turned out. I've made many new and wonderful friends, I travel and I am closer to my family more than ever. There were a couple of things I learned along the way...how to dig deeper for patience and to have more compassion for others. It's been a learning experience that I would not trade for anything in the world, i.e., a real eye opener.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
