Quote: Do you feel that a few of the veterans on this site (myself included definitely) push advice down your throats?
Do you feel bullied by myself or other veterans?
Do you have issues with my style of advice or other veterans on this site? If you just want to focus on me if that makes answering this question easier so be it, no worries
I a word - NO.
IMO, most of the things those of us who are struggling with our sitches need to hear are things we don't want to hear. I know that was definitely true for me early on.
Now, I find myself struggling, a year later, with implementing the wise advice I have been given over and over again. It is all on me, now. I have never felt bullied or intimidated. Yeah, there were times that I thought, "This guy is an a$$, he or she doesn't understand my sitch, it's different." As we all realize at one point, our stich's do have individual characteristics, but at their core, they aren't all so different.
Some use a "tough love" approach, some use sarcasm, etc. It's all good. Most vets should give up when it's clear to see we aren't following their advice. They must feel as if they are beating a dead horse. But they don't. They keep trying to get us to understand. Those who do get offended need to get a thicker skin.
This is the most difficult thing that most of us have faced. It's no fun and it's not easy. We don't need to be told what we want to hear, that wouldn't help anyone. There is a place for support and I find myself leaning that way with my posts. The vets have a special role because they have been there and come through on the other side better people. Marriages saved or not, if the vets weren't here, we would all just be crying on each other's shoulders. As I said, there's a need for that, too.
But, to learn and grow and be successful DBr's, the vets cannot be replaced.
I would like to say thanks for sticking with me and hammering me over the head and trying to make me see why things work and why they don't. We all have different, what?, speeds at understanding and implementing advice given. Most of the vets recognize this and try to be patient. This board has been a lifesaver for me and I am still learning from everyone. We all need to take the advice as intended. Everyone is trying to help. Period.
