The conversation where she wanted me to pay more attention to her was really just a litany of her complaints about my behaviour in the past...
Ouch. I know it can be hard to hear all that... can you perhaps look though, at the fact that through all that spew she's asking you for more attention? I think she's trying to share with you what makes her happy. When I was first starting to share my needs with my H it went alot like that too. In my sitch it seemed like I had to get out what I didn't want before I could share what I did want. I'm sorry, it's rough I know, and far from being fair and easy to listen to. You can take the thought or leave it, just trying to point out a different interpretation on what she's saying.
FMV,
All those complaints were things that I had been doing 180s with the last four months. And they were valid complaints.
