New thread - starting the protection phase!

[flowmom]

H4L, this is a really tough time for you and S. Hugs

Yes, it is horrifying how divorce can affect children. I know how you feel. The mother guilt still stabs me even though I am so much better off as a woman.

You have to choose whether to put your energy into feeling guilty and paralyzed about how this is affecting your S, or put your energy into helping him. S7 is currently seeing an art therapist (preceded separation) and I think and hope that it helps him to have an adult who is a trusted ally. Also, if you read Helping Kids Cope With Separation and Divorce you'll find many specific, age-appropriate ways to help your child navigate through this confusing, painful time. It include advice for high conflict situations. Try to mentally separate your loss and pain (the marriage), and your S's experience, because they are different.

One day at a time, one hour at a time, one breath at a time. Share with your S how you are calming yourself and becoming grounded in the moment.