Today I asked W to move out since she didn't have anything in our house anylonger. I told her it was best for our kids and I needed her to go so I could move on... Obviously she has. She was ok with me changing the locks, which I did in three seconds flat! She's out! Having her here was hell. It will be easier to move on. Not gonna see her really now other than passing kids to eachother, so I'm not sure how she'll see me GAL. Regardless this is something I need for me and really good for kids. My sister moved in today too, so that has put me in high spirits... Nice to have company right now. Not sure what the future holds for me and W, but I just need to clear my head and regroup.
Congratulations on your achievement Dad. I'm sure you will find detaching much easier now and your life will improve dramatically as mine has. It will be nice to have your sister around too. That will help prevent you from being alone too much, when the mind can wander back to W.
So I got a letter from W's attorney, I was shocked that she had stooped to an all time low. My W had agreed to move out and gave the ok to change the locks, she told her attorney I made her leave and changed the locks without her ok. She had moved her items into basement and had some things in garage, I suggested she move her pile into the garage with the other stuff to make it easier for her to pickup when later, she did move it. She told her attorney I made her do it. She said I was taking time off of work when she was home overnight with the kids. She had been removing things from our house and I took time to be here so she would not be able to continue to walk off with things, which was another reason I wanted to change the locks. She also mentioned an incident in which she had hit me with an elbow and I pushed her away, failed to mention her hitting me or the several other incidents where she kicked, hit, and threw things at me without a reaction. I'm not proud that I pushed her but it was following several attacks by her. So pissed she lied about her part and fabricated so much other stuff. Not suprised. I also heard ahexwa trying to record my conversations... I have not spoken to her in days... I asked her not to contact me unless an emergency and requested her not to even contact my cell phone. She still sends texts, I always ask her not to and requested that she call my home phone to leave a message or send an email. Petty... Probably but she texts all day otherwise. I am fuming over the latest lies and don't care to see or speak to her right now.
Some good news... W had hoped to have me take care of the kids 75% of the time... And have her 25% include 3 kids in school 75-80% of the time... While she demanded to be paid child support "no less than 900". I still can't believe her rediculousness... Obviously I should be paying anything, but I choose to in order to have my kids. The final figure came in today... $435 per mo after medical and dental premium removed... She will also have to pay $41 per child for school lunches... She didn't expect that I bet... So much for the rich single life. We have not had any real contact in about a week now. I think I am ok with it for now.
Don't set yourself up for being shocked by your WAW. She will not play fair! What does your lawyer say about paying the amount to her and you keeping the kids 75% of the time?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Oh I've definitely noticed the not playing fair side of her. We still have not talked much... Actually she just called to talk to kids, but called after they were put to bed... She had sent me an email saying she would call much earlier, but just said she forgot and she'd been busy at work. I only said I had put them to bed already.
My lawyer did not seem to hip on the idea of me having the kids so much and paying her too, but as I said earlier I can have them 75% of the time and pay her or have them 25% of the time and still pay her. I like the deal... Financially unfair that she gets money at all, but I MUST have my babies as much as possible regardless of the cost. I wish she wasn't rewarded for hardly being a parent, but hey I'm confident I'm walking away a winner.
I have to admit, I'm really fed up with W. I really wish things could work and somehow our family would be one again, but I can't see it happening. In my mind there is NO CHANCE... NO POINT... with the OM on her mind. Since she left the house, I find myself not wanting her back most of the time. Most of my friends have written her off... And I'm sickened by her friends who have supported her and believed her without even talking to me.
I have been hanging out with friends, W not around to even know. I have been working on changing my wardrobe, but there is some uncertainty with finances. I will be buying a new / newer SUV to transport the kids, so that will be a nice change. My sister is still here so that helps alot. I am doing my best to move on, but living in our house is tough when I'm alone... Memories flood in. I've got to get rid of this house at some point, but it will be years I'm afraid with the market so unstable. Kids are doing well! That's the important thing.
Because I'd be required to drop them off to the babysitter at her new home so they can sleep normal, otherwise they'd have to be picked up after 11pm... Not good for them. Based on me picking up at 2p and dropping off at her place by 8pm it's less than 25% I think. As I said it's not about the money... Obviously I don't want her to have too much cash to enjoy. Kids are my main goal... They need a stable parent.
