So H has texted twice today and called once. I haven't responded to any. I feel physically sick when I talk to him now. Is this detachment? Probably not if it brings up this strong a reaction. Should I play it cool and talk to him until I decide what move to make? We had agreed to keep talking to each other under the premise that we were working on our M, but I don't think I want that anymore. Suggestions on how to proceed? I want this to be deliberate, not based on emotions. Should I wait to drop this bomb until we are face to face (we are supposed to get together in two weeks), should I wait until after the holidays when I've had more time to save money, should I do it on the phone now, while I still have the dogs (so I can keep them...)
I feel physically sick when I talk to him now. Is this detachment?
No, I am pretty sure that is 'repulsion'.
Detachment is when you understand his problems are his, yours are yours, and you don't blame him for yours or yourself for his. It's when you understand where you stop and he begins.
M-47,W-40,No kids D-filed 5/27/2010 Piecing - 10/21/2010 -=Soon to be banned=-
Thanks guys...! Well, when it rains, it certainly pours. I was just offered a promotion at work (don't know how, I've been a crazy wreck and only functioning at 50% the last five months). I would be getting a $10,000 salary raise. I guess when one part of my life is in shambles, the other looks a bit brighter :-) This will at least help me get on my feet a bit. Don't know if I'm going to take it though, they want a 2 year commitment and I really am not that happy in this line of work and am looking to take courses to change jobs.
I'm not going to send my H any more pictures of me in my VS underwear, that's for my new fabulous boyfriend who won't be a jacka** and will appreciate the fact that I have an awesome body and not look elsewhere
Another lovely quote (I'm really loving this book it's making me laugh)
While it's not the end of the world, backsliding will rapidly undo all the hard work you've done and progress you've made. Ultimately - though it might feel good during the first few seconds that you see him/talk to him/start unbuttoning his pants - it will only serve to mess you up and make you feel like poo.
Story of my life the last few months hahaha :-) No more sexy skype chats, no more passionate once a month weekends, none of it!!
He must have noticed the distance in my voice when he called. We only chatted for 10 minutes, in the last few weeks I've been cheerful, upbeat, because I thought we were hitting a breakthrough and he was coming around. When we talked I wasn't all that interested in what he had to say. I didn't really care. He called back a few hours later, then said how he was trying to plan a fun weekend for us to spend together in two weeks??!! I told him I have a dodgeball tournament, so he tried to rearrange the weeks. Funny how now that I am through, it seems like he's upping his pursuit, maybe he senses I'm not interested? I suppose I'd make a great DBer now, if I wanted my marriage LOL
Seems to be the one who cares the least about the R controls the situation.
Quote:
I told him I have a dodgeball tournament
LMAO-
Stay strong asher, make sure you get what you want. Take one day at a time.
gr8
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
