Maam, you need to quit obsessing over what you did and what has occurred. You are becoming a depressive mess.
If you need to say it to him. Say it. Saying "I'm sorry" for what you did may piss him off more, but that would be his issue to deal with. You should just deal with your issues and get over them.
Would you think it would be better to act like you did nothing wrong and he is the loser and should be pining over you and asking to rub your feet and do the dishes and saying he is sorry?
