Wife's EA/PA how to handle changing situation

[blue2010]

My wife had EA lasted 6-9 months not posotive, it turned physical supposedly only three times the Bomb was dropped about 8 weeks ago. Initially she was very angry, we have been counseling individual and couples. I finally got angry about two weeks ago vented alot. Made clear what i was mad about. I have backed off done some noticeable 180's. She is still considering seperation but takes no real action to get out of the house. In the past couple days if I make physical contact ex:hands she doesn't rip right away as she did a couple weeks ago. We have been able to speak in normal conversation again. She will be going away alone for a week her and her dog kids have school. She will be no place close to OM location. I am trying to figure out if I should completly go dark while she is gone or send a friendly flower to remind her I still care. I want to fix this but do I listen to her words or pay attention to her actions? This is one roller coaster ride I would not recommend to others!