That is when you try to bargain with them to come back to the M.

"Come home we can work it out"

"if you will just work on the M ...."

If this

If that

It is a stage where you are still trying to control the situation or your spouse.

Often you can confuse setting boundaries with bargaining IMO. If your boundary is designed to illicit some repsonse from the WAS.

You are still trying to control them and haven't let go.

Doesn't really get you anywhere even IF they come back because you haven't addressed the problems. You run that risk unless both are committed for the right reasons.

Neither person has had the time to reflect and work on themselves.

Does that help?

My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am