This is not what I want, it's just not. As the days get closer to this journey being final, I have so many questions and not enough answers.
I want to call my wife, hear her voice, hear her laugh. I want to know when I come home from work we are all going to go out to eat again. I miss watching special milestones with my kids with her. I want to look forward to the Holidays as a family, decorate the Christmas tree, write a letter to Santa with the boys....together.
It sucks I am going through this, while she is with Mr. Wonderful, raising our kids with him.
I still cry about the loss everyday, what a far cry from vacation the last wek of June.
I've been in NC, and it still isn't getting easier. When I saw our names on the Divorce decree, it really hit me.
Why do I hold out hope for reconsiliation? It's hopeless.
How does she look at our boys and not feel something, this is not what's best for them.
I'm alone tonight, I'll probably post 50 times.
M-38 W-37 T-16,M-11 (Oct 30,1999) S-5 S-2 Wife left 7/4/2010
"When life hands you a lemon, say, 'Oh yeah, I like lemons! What else ya got?" — Henry Rollins
