That is when you try to bargain with them to come back to the M.
"Come home we can work it out"
"if you will just work on the M ...."
If this
If that
It is a stage where you are still trying to control the situation or your spouse.
Often you can confuse setting boundaries with bargaining IMO. If your boundary is designed to illicit some repsonse from the WAS.
You are still trying to control them and haven't let go.
Doesn't really get you anywhere even IF they come back because you haven't addressed the problems. You run that risk unless both are committed for the right reasons.
Neither person has had the time to reflect and work on themselves.
Does that help?
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
You know, I just want to say my appreciations for a change.
I'm thankful to really have so many of you as my support group.
Without you all, I don't know where I would be. My Life is great.
I realize the power of friendship and self worth and I just want to say I love each and everyone of you I know. Hopefully that list grows. (This is man-love BTW - except for PEI I give you my loving chest bump :P)
Seriously though, Thank you. I know I post my venting and my brutal honesty has created confusion, but I've learned to "re-word" it.
I just want to say special thanks to CD Bear. He is my Friend and always will be. Through him I met everyone else. No disrespect, but without him I wouldn't know any f'n one of you.
J3B, Man you are my Bro. I thank God for the opportunity to know you. I mean that Friend, nothing more.
All of the rest of you Human beings,MY VERY CLOSE HUMAN BEINGS, you are a loved group. Some of of you know the gifts I've been placed with for real, and each and everyone of you is part of that gift. Not to leave out names, but you ALL know who you are. I'm just sayin' THANK YOU.
Right Now:
I love my Wife very much. Make NO mistake. I don't reward her bad behavior, but I show her my "good light" I am her friend if she chooses. I hope that one day SHE will see my "group" vs Hers and realize the choices/changes I made and search that out. BUT until then I will enjoy my Life and it includes you all.