- she doesn't like being called a "drunk" even though she drank too much and got drunk and puked, this to me sounds like something that probably has happened before
Yes...twice actually...both times she puked out the window of the car with DD's in the back seat.
Originally Posted By: robx
- she is aware of all of these things but doesn't like the fact that someone called her on her bull$hit when she came home drunk because she isn't a "drunk", she can "handle her alcohol" which you can see by the evidence of the puke in your bed, that's how she handles it: she drinks on an empty stomach, mixes brandy with wine, drinks while lounging in a hot tub (which I believe is pretty dangerous) and then comes home and yaks in the marital bed and doesn't expect Mr. Smarty Farty Party Pooper pants to call her on her $hit
Those are my thoughts so far.
LOL!
Yes...I'm in complete agreement!
Well I'm glad you agree, because the next part may be tougher to swallow, you are dealing with someone who has a problem with alcohol, the extent of this problem isn't something I can diagnose remotely, you would know better than all of us, but including a reference to times where she has thrown up out the car window with your kids in the backseat of your car shows definite problems to me.
Nor do intend to respond to any of the last 4 texts that she sent
Good, stop responding to her text messages, let her text away, you need to start understanding and learning which msgs to respond to and which ones to let her send into outer space because you don't need to reply to every text msg, I don't care if it makes her angry or not, more importantly, you shouldn't care if it makes her angry or not if you reply to everyone or let several pass before replying to something that is worth a reply on your part.
Honestly...no. In the last 20 years I've gotten puke drunk once and that was after serious wine tasting and some cheap pizza and not in front of my children.
I know enough to not drink on an empty stomach and when to stop.
But you are correct...I've been a wussy by not saying something to W about her drinking.
M-43 FWW-42 T 20 M 16 DD10 DD8 EA: 1/10 Informal separation: 6/11/2010 Headed for D: 7/6/2010 Piecing? 9/10/10
I misunderstood validation obviously...I was trying to not talk her out of her feelings
She can feel whatever the heck she wants to feel like, newsflash, you can too!
My point is, what are you trying to achieve by validating her feelings?
You haven't been able to talk her out of her feelings in the past, what makes you think you'll be able to change her feelings by talking like this and if you aren't trying to change her feelings, what was being gained by talking like this, the technical term for how you did it is called "a$$ kissery"
Honestly...no. In the last 20 years I've gotten puke drunk once and that was after serious wine tasting and some cheap pizza and not in front of my children.
I know enough to not drink on an empty stomach and when to stop.
But you are correct...I've been a wussy by not saying something to W about her drinking.
So you do see that drinking too much and throwing up in front of your kids is bad.
And you also know enough that you shouldn't drink too much and definitely not on an empty stomach and you should know when to stop.
This is a GOOD thing.
Yes you have been a WUSSY for not speaking up earlier.
You see you have a bigger problem than most of the people on these forums with regards to an unfaithful spouse and a rocky marriage, you are dealing with someone who might be an alcoholic. You do need to speak up.
Now the question is how do I call her out on her drinking?
Wife I have been afraid of telling you this in the past because I was afraid of rocking the boat but now that I've moved out, a lot of things will be changing with respect to you and I.
You drink too much, I think you have a drinking problem.
And then expect her to explode into a million pieces and call you every bad name in the book, alcoholics rarely enjoy being called alcoholics, your wife doesn't have a great opinion of you now, watch things get worse, a lot worse before they ever have a chance of getting better.
