"so which advice would work best in your case? " Wisdom is YOURS, just like your backbone and your eyesight, not any expert's. You seem to be asking some good questions and making some insightful observations, e.g. On self esteem. And keeping a PMA.
I don't think I did a good job of telling her she was beautiful before the Bomb. Now, I've tried to give her compliments without pursuing, (a fine line).
And I agree that Gucci's example is masterful. Just not sure how well it applies to my sitch today. It's definitely something I'd use as things get better, but right now it seems to be the wrong thing to do; buying her affection via boobs seems to be the ultimate in pursuit and almost desperate.
why would a woman who is so concerned about our finances want to get a bubbie job/sell the house when that will only hurt our financial situation?
can you answer this question for me?
Quote:
it's not logic it's how she feels, her feelings can and will change. she doesn't want you to fix her feelings, understand it for what it is - her feelings which are important to her and the key to her heart.
it's not about buying her affection via boobs. it's about making deposits in her love bank with her LL. (yeesh, D4MIL can't believe she's saying that).
you admitted that you didn't do a good job of telling her that she was beautiful. in other words, you weren't making any deposits.
take the focus off the boobs - i know you're a man .. it's hard. but work with me.
i gave the example to danf .. "you never take me out to dinner!" is not about spending money at a fancy restaurant. it's about wanting quality time together.
why would a woman who is so concerned about our finances want to get a bubbie job/sell the house when that will only hurt our financial situation?
can you answer this question for me?
Quote:
it's not logic it's how she feels, her feelings can and will change. she doesn't want you to fix her feelings, understand it for what it is - her feelings which are important to her and the key to her heart.
it's not about buying her affection via boobs. it's about making deposits in her love bank with her LL. (yeesh, D4MIL can't believe she's saying that).
you admitted that you didn't do a good job of telling her that she was beautiful. in other words, you weren't making any deposits.
take the focus off the boobs - i know you're a man .. it's hard. but work with me.
i gave the example to danf .. "you never take me out to dinner!" is not about spending money at a fancy restaurant. it's about wanting quality time together.
Quote:
PB ~ One of our sticking points was me taking a PhD in residence away from Coach and the fam. He was dead set against it and we FOUGHT big time over this. Part of coming home and reconciling was for me to recognize what that would do to our M, and for him to articulate his concerns about it in terms that were not controlling. In other words, he went from "If you go, our M won't survive it. You're just leaving us! I'm against it." to "I fully support you returning to school for your doctorate. How can I support you as you find a way to do this within the M?"
See? Greek
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
So buy her a new pair of boots. In regard to her magnificent yet minimal mammary use a Victoria Secret Onder Bra. I wore one for Halloween and I would have put Carmen Electra to shame!
Her entire brassiere collection is VS Wonderbras...
Checking in to salivate some more.
VS is where my woman shops exclusively. She keeps leaving the catalogs on the bar all the time for me to drool over. I think I know the girls in it by their names.
