I am new to the group. Let me use this opportunity to say hi to everyone. It is great to know that there are so many of you who are, or have been, in the same boat as me.
My wife has very low sex drive. What hairdog has said struck a cord in me. We have been married for 14 years. The last time we really have good sex was before we got married. Since about 7 years ago, things have been going down-hill much quicker. We changed from having sex once a week, to once a month, to once a year, and then to nothing 4 years ago. Because I am a man and I have sexual needs. All these years, I secretly went on Internet to visit pron sites just to get a temporary relief. Recently, in the name of openness, I revealed to her that I went on Internet to look at pron pictures. She got very upset and threatened to cancel our Internet subscription. Of course that is not going to work. Nonetheless, I complied and I have not looked at those sites since then.
I guess my question to you, hairdog, is: how did you recognize your problem and begin to deal with it. She is now blaming me for all the problems we are having and she has little desire to change. What would it take for her to recognize her problem? I know I am responsible too and have been taking the actions to change. The fact that I had the courage to be opened up to her, after bottling it up for all this year, is to hope for a better relationship. Recently I came very closed to having an affair. That scared me a lot but I don’t know how much longer I can hang on. It has been very painful and I need all the help I can get!
