A little interaction between you and the W and you freak the fu*k out…..your better than this chit and YOU know it.
Agree completely! This was a pretty tame interaction to be all worked up over. It’s most likely gonna get a lot worse before it gets better. You have choices ... ignore the calls (yes you tried but they got to ya), turn off the phone (now I totally understand NOT wanting to do that one ... I’m not sure I even breathe without mine anymore ), or answer - keep it brief, show her the NEW and improved Faith, end the convo first, do not take the bait and VALIDATE ... And then ... shake it off ... stop wondering ... just get to gettin’ (nickle B-lady) and keep moving forward with your life.
Originally Posted By: Tutu wearing Rican
"My friend, this is where the rubber meets the road. This is the time YOU need to LIVE your changes. Don’t just talk about them – NO – live them. Don’t just regurgitate what you have heard – NOPE. Live it ! Feel it….learn from it. You want growth? You want to be the MAN that you want to be? Time to man up? Time to finally NOT LET YOUR EMOTION drive what comes out of YOUR mouth. Ya wanna be the man that you aspire to be? Well, show YOURSELF who that man is and not by posting it…but ONCE AGAIN BY LIVING IT."
This ^^^^ takes time ... I’ve only recently learned that at first ya get to fake it till ya make it ... then when you’ve made it ... you’ll relearn being REAL. It’s a process Faith ... and we all expect a lot of you, being in the advanced PhD class and all, but what really matters is what YOU expect of yourself. We know you can do this. Do you? We know you have what it takes. Do you?
IMO, who the he!! gives a flying f@ck what your W is thinking right now? SHE probably doesn’t even know half the time so STOP trying to figure it out ... it doesn’t matter anyway ... know why? Cause my guess is it doesn’t change your path one iota. Does it?
You got this buddy ... but it takes time to take hold ... My skin is just starting to feel comfortable, and then, just when I’m humming along ... BOOM ... pity party extravaganza! Guess what though ... they don’t last near as long, and I learn something every time. So ... shake it off ... go to work on detachment ... and keep on truckin’ ...
*** Hijack alert ***
Originally Posted By: Tutu wearing Rican
Real MEN are Patient Kind Loving Strong FORGIVING
Real Men are Confident in why they are doing what they do Not afraid of pain Can suck it up for what they believe in Can make a mistake, learn from it and CHANGE It
REAL men ... not afraid of pain??? C’mon, really think about that for a sec ... ALL humans are afraid of pain. Alpha males may hide their fear, run around chest thumping and roaring, but does that make them REAL men? IMO, what makes REAL men (and REAL women for that matter) is courage. Courage is facing fear, facing pain, and moving forward anyway.
Originally Posted By: Tutu wearing Rican
Real men can suck it up for what they believe in?
My H "sucked it up for what he believed in" for 6 years + .... he believed in family, he believed in marriage, he believed in making his wife happy. Sorry to yell but .... SEE WHERE THAT GOT US???? IMO, Real men (and real women) love themselves enough to set boundaries and enforce them. They respect themselves enough to not be "nice guys" or a$$holes or b!tches .... etc.
NOW ... if you meant “suck it up and do the WORK” then I completely and totally agree ... because the work is hard. It’s a choice ... no one can tell you that you have to do it. Nope. But we can tell you Faith, from experience, that doing it pays off in multiples.
As a final thought ... I absolutely 100% agree that real men ... and real women ... can make mistakes, learn from them and make CHANGES. E is living proof. So am I. So are sooooooo many of the men and women on this board. Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
