Should I Tell Her To Move Back.....?

[mza8]

Gr8, I think the way you stated your feelings about your W's GF sounds too much like an ultimatum...not good. It goes back to creating healthy boundaries (although I think the term "boundaries" is way overused). Tell her what you need...simple as that. If it's truly a deal breaker for you then you'll have to decided what you're going to do if your W doesn't want to end contact with her GF.

In my opinion I'm not sure I would even discuss your W's GF right now...at least not on your first meeting with W. If you truly want to reconcile then I believe you should try to create positive interactions with W, not negative. So many times I've read here that we should be the person that attracted our spouse to us in the first place. I doubt that we gave ultimatums and tried to control our spouse at that time.

In the end you'll handle it the way you'll handle it. Just ask yourself what your ultimate goal is and if it's reconiling with your W ask yourself if what you're about to do will help you towards that goal or will hurt your endeavors. There's a right time and place for everything. It doesn't necessarily all need to be discussed the very first meeting. I'm not saying you shouldn't talk about what's on your mind but maybe talk about some things later on. I would just hate to see you push for too much the first time and your W puts her wall back up. Patience...