One thing I don't need a crystal ball for... I know contacting his parents, even without exposure, will make him beyond angry. I has enormous love and respect for them and I know he would not like me to contact them. He would just like me to go away...
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
One thing I don't need a crystal ball for... I know contacting his parents, even without exposure, will make him beyond angry. I has enormous love and respect for them and I know he would not like me to contact them. He would just like me to go away...
WHATEVER you do, blgp, don't do it based on "Will it make him angry." Do it based on "Is it the right thing to do?"
If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
Hey blgp, that was my tagline for a long time. It's also used in a Van Zant tune ~ Help Somebody
Bomb 8/09. Brief piecing 12/10. D-2/12 Two incredible kids D9,S6 Leading new life! “Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person we become."
No, no Starsky, I definitely don't want to do it to make him angry. That is the main reason I haven't done it yet. He LIKES the fact that I can't easily communicate with his parents, especially his mom. He never wanted the two most important people in his life to compare notes about him. I guess that was a hint right there that he is not the kind of person that can face himself.
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
Starsky, I just reread your post and realized I misunderstood what you said... You're saying not to let him getting angry get in the way of doing the right thing. If I knew it was the right thing, I wouldn't let his anger persuade me... Unfortunately, I don't know what is the right thing.
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
Thanks everyone for the discussion earlier on when to send the letter to his parents etc.
I think I was feeling a little emotional today, drank caffeine and got a little crazy. I don't think it is the right time right now. I will let this play out a little longer... we aren't corresponding right now and I think it is a good thing. I do think he is probably deeper in the A.
He is about to get a letter from my L that says we will answer him after the 1st of the year. Even though he says I can take as much time as I need, his actions haven't reflected that. He came to me only 5 days ago to again hound me for a retirement account letter. He is living in inner turmoil... and now he is about to find out that I pretty much hired one of the best L in town and he has to wait two months to move closer to end living two lives. I think I will see how that goes over before proceeding with the letter. I also don't think outright exposure to them is a good idea. Ahh, the up and down of emotions!
(Formerly blgp) Me-35 H-33 Married 4 yrs Together 9 yrs "Bomb" 8/1/10 Separated 8/6/10 D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11
"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."
You are talking through things and not reacting on emotions and that is good. I wish I could tell you how to get off the rollercoaster, but sometimes it is just unavoidable, sounds like now might be one of those times.
Hang in there, will say some prayers for you. I know this is hard
M39 W41 Two children WAW bomb dropped 11/7/09 Piecing Aug 10 - Nov 10 No longer piecing...Nov 10 Separation Jan 11 EA ends again Feb 11 Piecing attempt #2, Mar 11
