I intend to live forever - so far, so good

[soleil]

No, I said he should approach women who state in their profile they aren't interested in a R but are looking for someone to spend time with.

I agree w/ this. Because CTH himself has said he won't do anything to move the D forward so this seems the route to go as opposed to meeting up with women looking for LTRs.

[v1olin]

Personally, when I started dating Myself I wasn't looking for anything serious but over time it just grew and now we're together 24/7. It's as though it was just meant to be!

Yeah wii, and you don't even have to worry about yourself rolling over saying, "I have a headache." !!

[whatisis]

Personally, when I started dating Myself I wasn't looking for anything serious but over time it just grew and now we're together 24/7. It's as though it was just meant to be!

Yeah wii, and you don't even have to worry about yourself rolling over saying, "I have a headache." !!

That's true, but at my age it would probably be "Sorry, I didn't take my Viagra tonight"

[ClingingToHope]

Just a blah day. Another meltdown by D8 right before leaving for work just put a damper on my day.

We had the meltdown Sunday in the woods. Monday, I've got them all packed up (they were off school for some institute day) and I was talking to the after-school sitter and D8 bolts for the woods.

She's standing in there and I am telling her she needs to come out because I have to go to work. She won't come out because she wants the sitter to come see something and I tell her there's no time and she starts running farther into the woods.

And I just lost it and chased her down and she ran again and I chased her down again.

Ugh ... the whole episode took about 30 minutes and I'm going to post some very clear rules in regards to the woods.

Part of it for her was just the excitement of a new house and the forest next door and I'm going to have to set some clear expectations.

I just had little patience with her after yesterday. Hopefully, I just needed a break. Again, I don't know why STBXW wants to be a single parent. It can be exhausting.

When I got into work I started putting together a schedule for part-time job No. 2 this winter. Me and two friends work for a local high school as the official scorekeepers and time keepers for the boys and girls high school teams.

Essentially, I have one guy who works every weekend and another who works the nights I can't -- Wednesdays and the weekends I have my girls.

So I'm putting together the schedule and I have seven Tuesday night games. Not a problem last year. This year, right now I'm taking one of the girls every Tuesday night because D11 has band practice at 6:50 a.m. on Wednesdays.

I could take D11 those nights, but that means she'll be sitting at Jefferson High School from 5 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. I'll email STBXW and find out how long these Tuesdays are lasting -- D11 was unclear on how long these band practices are going to run.

The basketball games take me through February and in March the running races start again. I'm going to have to ask STBXW to switch four weekends this year so I can work.

[whatisis]

D is acting out because of the move. It's just one more thing she had no control over, not that you could have done anything different. Yes, set boundaries but cuddle and tell her how much you love her. Moves are stressful especially when you're dealing with the break up of your parents marriage. Hang in there, CTH. With patience, boundaries and lots of love she'll be fine.

[ClingingToHope]

Slight stab of pain. I posted pix from the first week at the house on FB. I tagged D11 so I went to her page to see how it looked. STBXW's profile pic was there and it's changed. I clicked on it. It's her smiling face and it appears to be from her South Dakota trip.

Now, she's gained weight, but it doesn't matter. It hurt. I think it always will, at least a little bit.

Going to change for my Monday night basketball game. I need to get some frustrations out of my system.

[ClingingToHope]

Wii, I forgot to mention that there is a protected wetlands next to the new house so if my brain swirls too much I can go in there and have that weekend where I thrash everything out in my brain.

Or maybe just 15 minutes and then just head back in and watch TV.

[ClingingToHope]

Text from STBXW this morning asking why we didn't work on D8's homework over the weekend.

Truthfully, I forgot. It was very busy and she hasn't had homework yet on the weekend.

I texted back. "Very busy weekend. I forgot to check D8's backpack. Sorry."

My bad. Things should calm down now that I'm moved in. I got an email from STBXW on Tuesday nights. I'll have one or the other on Tuesdays until December 10 then they go back to the old schedule.

That's good. Starting Dec. 14, I work a lot of Tuesday nights so it was going to be difficult to keep it up.

Email from Match_35 apologizing again about last week. We're going to again try to do dinner this month. Really, last week was crazy.

Money worries. My attitude about life in general goes up and down based on my finances. I know my plan is good long term. It's just a struggle and when money is tight the bitterness kinds of rises. I try to remember though that I had the same feelings WITH STBXW because she was spending so recklessly.

I'd sit there and wonder why we couldn't save when the two of us made so much, but bill after bill after bill would roll in and I just had this helpless feeling.

Now I know my success depends only on me.

[ClingingToHope]

Good night with D11 yesterday. We are going to rotate on Tuesdays. I had D8 last week and I had D11 last night.

After she got her homework done, we hit the health club for 45 minutes then we headed over to the divorce class.

She hung out with the daughter of another lady at my table. She's a freshman in high school so D11 was asking her what high school is like.

Weird time at the table. The session was about anger and everyone was chiming in. There was a new lady there and she asked me if I still wanted to reconcile.

That took me back. I paused and said, "well, the divorce should be final soon so that doesn't really matter." But they were waiting so I told them that if STBXW actually said she wanted to reconcile I'd have three conditions.

1) That we take the marriage class together.

2) That we do Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University together.

3) That she never went out with her best friend in that small town 30 minutes from here again without me. I don't know what she's done with her new motorcycle buddies, but I know the trust would be gone. She could go as long as I go with.

That's it. The two older ladies said I was trying to control her and it would never work. I said she threw me out. I never once didn't trust her, but now that's gone and if she really wanted to reconcile then she'd agree. Otherwise, it would never work.

The table leader then asked me what I would change and I had to think. There's been so much I learned taking those classes that I don't think I'd be anything like I was before.

But really, it was all just mental gymnastics. There's been zero indication from STBXW that she's doubting herself at all.

Tonight, I have both and D11 is going to go to the church program for 6th through 8th graders and D8 and I might head to the library. Life marches on.

[ImprovedRomeo]

Those are weird questions for sure but by now there's no more pausing or pondering on my part. If someone asked me, the answer would be- no reconciliation, that ship has already sailed.
And I wouldn't change a damn thing about me, I'm finger lick'n good the way I am! just ask me!