Pen - I understand how difficult this is, but like other board members have suggested you need to build a new, stronger foundation NOW. You do that by not making it easy for her. Make her realize she has to gain your respect again. Nothing wrong with showing strength by letting her know that this hasnt been easy for you and you have a lot of thinking to do. You do value marriage, but you want to make sure you are with someone that does as well.

She needs to earn it!!

PMA